- Lakers will win Game 5. Game 6 will be close one, but I think the Lakers win that one too.
- Dodgers will continue to win the West.
- Michael Steele will reveal that he's actually white in the near future.
- The author of this blog will go on a run of hot women that will only be matched by Derek Jeter's famous run. Where's Salma Hayek when you need her?
- Rush Limbaugh will continue to wreak havoc on his support staff with more "silent but deadlies."
- 10 years from now, everyone that ever appeared on American Idol will reveal that they're actually gay.
- Attorney General Eric Holder will attend NORML's national "Get your blunt on" event, and get with it like Doobie Howser.
- Rasheed Wallace will hear about the AG doing this, and say "&%$% #$#%!" But, he'll mean it as a compliment as he fires up a blunt.
- MLB Channel will call out the Diamondbacks announcers again for bragging about how great the team's bullpen. (Darren Douchebag, an announcer for the DBags, got called out yesterday as the MLB Network quoted him bragging about how the bullpen was one of the best in the MLB, only to give up 7 runs about 30 minutes after he said that.)
- Fat will be the new "sexy" in American culture, about 60 years from now. Wait ... let's make that grossly overweight.
- Some douchebag in some Midwestern Legislature will wear jean shorts to at least one legislative session.
- The Yankees will easily win the AL East.
Definitions (courtesy of Urban Dictionary):
- Manufactured Outrage
A falsified righteous outrage at things that are basically unimportant and meaningless, frequently employed by politicians, political activists, or the media. Politicians and talking heads use it to garner support for their causes, to claim the moral high ground and to tar their opponents; the media often just uses it in a cynical bid to increase ratings.
Manufactured outrages of note include Nipplegate, the Monica Lewinski scandal, the 2009 tea partys, backmasked satanic lyrics, lapel pin controversies...Just about any time you hear any politician, activist, or radio show host getting outraged about anything, really. The louder and angrier they get, the harder they're working at manufacturing it.
- farting gift
The act of someone farting immediately before leaving a room; leaving that special something to be remembered by.
Person 1: That party was the worst. Person 2: Don't worry, I made sure to thank them with a farting gift.
One last prediction:
- Someone will shit/shard themselves in an embarrassing failure of an attempt to leave a "farting gift" after reading this definition.
